Thursday, January 31, 2008

Looking for love in all the wrong places

It never ceases to amaze me how some women seem to always confuse love and sex.

A friend of mine, I'll call him James, a self admitted D-O-G, met this random woman on one of the social networking websites. Within a few days of meeting face to face, she has already laid down for this man. She must have been turned out because the next thing you know, she is posting all kinds of comments, laying claim to him, informing other women that she is the one and only. Started to sound sort of stalker - ish. It could have gotten a whole lot worst for James considering he broke the number one rule in the player's handbook. He brought this woman to his house!! He had no clue what this woman was capable of. She could have wore his ass out, and not in a good way. Something straight out of Gaelle's song "Parkway". He would have deserved it, as far as I am concerned. He should have been straight with the woman. He just wanted a one night stand and then to move on. But I guess honestly wouldn't have gotten him laid so quickly.

Anyway, some time passes. About a month. She has came to realization that James was just looking for the fast ass, which should have been obvious from jump. She wrote a little blog entry, dedicated to the once, so brief, love of her life, James. She lays out his whole game, the one she fell for, whipping out the Platinum card to offer to buy her nice things, bragging about the "package" he's working with and how he can do it "all night long", which turned out to be a short night, a very short night. What was so perplexing to me, reading her blog entry, was how surprised she was. She couldn't understand why he lied to her. And she took no responsibility for her own actions. She seemed so focused by the potential of a man with money to spend on her and back breaking, mind numbing orgasms that she was blinded to realization that maybe, just maybe this was a little too good to be true. That maybe, just maybe, giving up the puddy after less than three days is most likely not the beginnings of happily after ever.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Life After People

The History Channel showed a special last night called "Life After People". It is a hypothetical look at life on Earth if suddenly the Earth's human population was decimated to zero. My husband wouldn't watch the show with me. He said it was too depressing. But there will probably come a time humans no longer walk the Earth. I've been slightly paranoid of this thought since age 10, when I picked up the Childcraft Encyclopedia, volume 4, entitled "Space". It described how the Sun is really just a star and will actually burnout, leaving the Earth frigid and inhabitable for life as we know. There is a movie based around this theory. I read way too much as a kid.

The show does not go into predictions as to why humans suddenly become extinct. However, two scenarios popped into my head. Armageddon will either be a man-made catastrophe or Mother Nature reclaiming the planet. Or, even, a combination of both. We are living in a generation, probably the first generation, in which we have the technology to blow ourselves off the planet!

They start from day one and go all the way to ten thousand years of life without people. By then, there is very little evidence that the human race ever existed. None of our skyscrapers, bridges or highways. Nature takes back everything. Got me to thinking. So many people worry about leaving behind a legacy. Is it really that big of a deal? I mean, some people scrimp and save to leave a legacy to ungrateful children. The children turn around and squander the whole wad. I understand why my grandmother always says there is no reason to wait around for her to die. She plans to enjoy every single penny of her money before she dies. She plans to just leave enough for final expenses. As far as she is concerned, nobody will be getting rich off of her death.

It's not like we can control what happens to our legacy once we are gone. Eventually, we will all be forgotten and any evidence of our existence will be lost or destroyed. It just seems that we need to focus more on the now, while we are here on this planet. Make the most of time on this planet.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

The American Idol audition rounds

I'll admit it! I love watching the American Idol audition rounds. It is my guilty pleasure to watch some of the no talent wannabes try to convince the judges that they are best undiscovered new talent. It never ceases to amaze me. Confidence is one thing, but many of these people are just plain out of touch with reality. No singing ability whatsoever.

One contestant came on the show at the urging of his co-workers. Here is his audition, if you dare:

He needs to go back to work and smack the shit out of those lying ass co-workers of his. They obviously wanted him to go and make a fool out of himself.

And this guy. OMG, he was just plain scary. If I was Paula Abdul, I would have had a restraining order placed on this guy and get a 24 hour bodyguard. Creepy!!!

Techie moment - MacBook Air... wow!

I love Apple, but I am extremely displeased with their latest MacBook offering. The MacBook Air. Advertised as the world's thinnest notebook. That it is. It should also be advertised as the most expensive and useless notebook. That it is. $3000 and all I get is a lousy 64GB hard drive??? Ok, ok, but the hard drive is a solid state hard drive, hence, no moving parts, hence more durability. But $3000? And only 64GB? I'm obvious not ready to pay so much for so little hard drive space. I am too spoiled with getting 80GB to 160GB of hard drive space in a notebook for a 1/3 of the price. 64GB is barely enough to hold my applications!! It doesn't even come with a superdrive. The laptop is too thin to accommodate Apple's slot loading drive. But wait, not to worry. You can purchase a external one for an additional $99. There's no ethernet port so add on another $29 dollars for that. It is way too dependent on everything being wireless. I'm not quite there yet. And no firewire port???

Some cool points. I like the remote disc option. I can set up the optical drive on another computer to be shared with the MacBook Air. I also like the new trackpad features. They added new gestures, very similar to iPhone gestures, like pinch (zooming in and out), swipe (paging items left and right) and rotate, useful in many applications. And hey, it's thin enough to fit into a manila interoffice envelope!

Maybe I am being to hard on the MacBook Air. I guess it is not completely useless for some. But for a power user like myself, it still has a long way to go.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Baltimore men

I was with a group of women over the weekend and, of course, the discussion veered towards the lack of good men in the Baltimore area. As usual, I was quick to defend my Baltimore brothers. I just hate to think that my hometown cannot breed a descent stock of good men. But I guess it is time to come out of my denial. Seeing that I haven't been in love's battlefield in almost 10 years, I started looking at some of my dating friends and relatives.

One of my sisters has been dating a guy she met while she was in the military. They have been together for about 2 or 3 years. He was raised in New York. Prior to that, she tried a couple of online dating services, with quite a few "interesting" dates in the area. One in particular that I remember her describing was with a guy who was 24 going on 10. His table manners were hideous (remember the "see food" joke when you were a kid). He had absolutely no intelligent conversion. It sounded more like babysitting than a date.

One of my friends is currently dating a guy from Virginia. They have a descent relationship. I always know that it must be serious when she tells the guy's name. She describes as a good man, better than what she kept running into here in Baltimore.

And the more that I think about, there has been only one other man in my life that I would have considered marrying. Yes guessed it, he was not born and raised in the greater Baltimore metro area. I had to go 8 hours west to find his ass!

But I kept thinking, what about my husband's friends that are single? With the exception of about 2 of them, they appear to be good dating material. Once again, my thesis does not hold consistently. Most of those men have relocate here from other states. They're complaining that there are not enough good, single, approachable women here.

To be continued...

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Another reason to not be pleased with the governor

Ok, I'm pissed!!! What the hell was O'Malley thinking? Raising the sales tax? In the past 2 years, my property taxes have raised significantly, the water bill has gone up, I cannot keep a decent budget because the BGE gas commodity charge ranges anywhere from $35 to $150 month to month. Thank goodness I never took up smoking. The tax on that went another $1. If I did smoke, it would definitely be time to quit. I just don't understand why the State is so quick to tax the hell out of its citizens, especially when the State is so SLOOOOOOOOOW to approve efforts to improve the quality of living for its citizens.

And the businesses in the State? Well, any business that is into big ticket items. Consumers are already feeling the pinch of the market slowdown. I wonder how many MD residents will cross the line to Delaware to purchase that new sofa or that new LCD television.

I realize that taxes are a necessary evil. All I'm saying is that there must be other ways to increase revenue besides consistently raising taxes.

Happy New Year!!!

I hope all my readers brought in the new year with a bang!!

A friend of mine forwarded me this email, thought I'd share:
Thanks to all who sent me e-mails in 2007
I really mean it, I want to send my thanks to all who sent me e-mails last year in particular:
  • I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that needs sealing.
  • Also, I now have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.
  • I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown); who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.
  • I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.
  • Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants me to split $7 million with me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who died intestate.
  • I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.
  • I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
  • Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
  • Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca-Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
  • I no longer can buy gas without taking a friend along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.
  • I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
  • I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.
  • Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my bum.
  • And thanks to your great advice, I can't even pick up the $5.00 I found dropped in the car park because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.
If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00pm this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump.

I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.

By the way....a South American scientist after a lengthy study has discovered that people with low IQ who have infrequent sexual activity always read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.